Category: On the road…

Suzan and I were pretty zonked after a day of travel so we decided to spend our first afternoon in New York with some aimless wondering. We took in the Gotham Book Mart, 85 years-young this year and still running like clockwork. Has an amazingly knowledgable staff, an enormous poetry section that Suzan got lost in and is so old school that they fill out orders by hand. I wasn’t so charmed by the last part when they mistakenly combined my purchases with Suzan’s and had to spend 20 minutes untangling them. I don’t find luddites charming. I find them sad. GBM seems to recognize this though. One of the clerks grinned when I asked if they are getting their own website. “We’re working on it”, he said, and practically winked at me.

Oh and I learned who Delmore Schwartz was. His picture is all over the walls of the place.

From there, with it getting dark, we grabbed a cab to the East Village so Suzan could do some window shopping. I spent way too much time in Dinosaur Hill and bought some antique buttons for a $5 schmate of a shirt I purchased in Cuba that lost its buttons after one wearing. What did I expect? The buttons were $7, 40% more than the shirt.

After stopping for a black & white cookie, we grabbed the subway back to the hotel to meet Jo for dinner.

An excellent, aimless day in New York.

It’s always a good sign when I don’t write a lot that I had a great time while on the road. My time at the Texas Book Festival was this way.

I really had a great time. I don’t get to go to Austin that often (where I was in graduate school from 1997-2000) except for a week in March each year. I have old friends to see, old hangouts to visit, a slow, casual pace of existence there that feels just like a vacation. Even though I was busy, I felt relaxed.

My panel was fine. It was great to see Paul Collins again and to talk books, busines sand Iowa city. I also met Geoff Guinn, books editor of the Fort Worth-Star Telegram, and Kyle Smith, author of the very funny sounding Love Monkey. On our topic “Literature, Alive or Dead?” I’d say we voted “Alive” and kept the audience engaged in passing our verdict.

Arrived in Austin today for the Texas Book Festival. Checked into the Omni Hotel downtown, ran into my friend Amanda Ward in the lobby. Invited me to go swimming in the rooftop pool with her and her friend Dao Strom (author of this fabulous book) and Dao’s son Lincoln to take a dip in the rooftop pool, 20 stories above the Texas hill country.

I did a few laps after they took off. Now I’m back in my room on the free Wifi, watching the end of Oprah and about to hop into the tub. I’m having dinner with the Browns, Kevin and Jefe at 7:30.

Could life get any sweeter?

Must sleep. Jet Lag. More later.

No Saturday Morning Shards this week as I’m off to Ireland. i get back on Monday the 15th, jet-lagged and painted green. Oh and a year older. On Aug. 7, I turn 31 years young.

See you soon.

Heading to Philadelphia today for Mix Weekend then onto Chicago for BEA. Updates sporadic until then. Have a good week ya’ll.

Back home now. A wild two days in Baltimore, complete with a 10 year reunion concert of the Mental Notes, a singing group that several friends of mine began our senior year at Hopkins. One of the original members remarked that current Mental Notes were 8 when the group began. Dayammmmnnn!

The Hillel dedication was amazing. All these familiar faces from Jewish Baltimore that I remember from my days at the BJT, the beautiful building with meeting rooms, religious services, a library and an activities center that will serve the Hopkins Jewish community for generations. My dad looked happier than I’ve seen him in a long time. I’m super proud of both my parents for putting their money where their heart is.

Now I’m home, trying to get caught up but not killing myself. May is a rather light month which just a few magazine assignments, little book business and a Litquake item or two before I leave for BEA the first weekend of June.

Off I go.

In New York. Got in about 8 PM to Chateau Mom and Dad, dropped bags and took off down Broadway for a meal at Josie’s. Got home just after 10, watched the remainder of The Iron Giant on my laptop which is a sweet little film. Then called Suzan and said goodnight.

Whenever I travel, which is a lot, I’m asked “How was your flight?” I rarely have a good answer for that. Well, I didn’t crash over Nebraska so that was good. But my seatmate snored the whole trip and she wasn’t even alseep. That’s bad. Mostly I’m just glad it’s over.

I hate air travel mostly because you have to divide your pleasures and pains into such tiny chunks. Am I really better for it that I got a handful of dried cherries instead of peanuts or that the kid behind me only shrieked occasionally instead of crying from takeoff to landing?

So I’d like someone to come up with a rating scale to measure the quality of air travel. We have the Airline Passenger Bill of Rights which mentions comfort briefly but focuses mostly on price and reliable information.

I’ll be firm here. Price is not a measure of quality. The airline business is competitive as all get out with low-cost providers like Southwest and JetBlue leading the way. Keeping the discussion focused on price allows the airlines to divert your attention from being stacked like lumber in a metal tube hurling across the skies and thanking them for it.

So I’m going to to create this little scale here that you can use the next time you travel to answer that question “How was your flight?” It’s completely based on the flight experience and has nothing to do with whether you received adequate information about connecting red eyes in Witchita.

Add up your points at the end.

1) Does you seat recline? +3 points

2) In doing so, does your seat cushion end up on the floor? -5 points?

3) Does you window shades open and shut without you breaking out into a sweat to do it? +2 points

4) Is the air conditioning already on when you enter the plane? +4 points

5) Does it not turn on and the captain or flight attendant makes a joke about how hot it is today? -7 points

6) When boarding, does the gate agent insist you board by row number (Good for them. Better I sit here at the gate reading Cosmo Girl than be trapped standing up on the plane when passenger 23B realizes their seat is 13F)? +1 point

7) In doing so, does every overhead bin fill up when only half the plane has boarded (There has to be some corrollation between the size of the bag you are allowed to check and the amount of space available for storage. And jamming it at my feet when my knees are already touching my ears doesn’t count?) -6 points.

8) In something edible served on any flight over two hours? +2 points.

9) I said edible. -2 points

10) Do you show a movie on a transcontinental flight? +3 points

11) Old episodes of Dharma & Greg are not a movie. -1 point

12) Does the plane have more than one bathroom in coach class? +5 points.

13) Does a flight attendant scold you for “getting in their way” while you wait to use it? -8 points.

If the airline has done its job, you should have a positive score after taking this little quiz. And still have feeling below your knees.

First full day of the conference means wishing I had gone to bed before 3 AM on the first half-day. Special forces operatives are better rested than this.

Maybe 12 of us ended up at the Omni bar after Break Bread with Brad and karaoke singings at Polyesters. I did a repeat of “With or Without You.” There are picftures somewhere. Please ignore them.

Dave took off for the day to catch a Jonathan Demme panel and to see Adam Goldberg and Christina Ricci in person introduction their film “I Love Your Work.” I passed them both on the escalator. Adam wore 1970’s highway patrolmen shades and a three day bird. He still looked cool.

I managed to get over to Kickball in time to bat three times and play my usual first base (heavy action-light running position). My team won this year which really shouldn’t mean anything. Why does it then?

I’m in the panelist’s lounge now, trying to get some notes together before the 3:30 panel on Small Media. Dan Gilmour, who’s on the panel is sitting next to me and pretended to recognize me when I said hey.

Just touched down in Austin. Got rental car. Stocked up on provisions at the mother of all Whole Foods. So much to do and see before everyone gets here on Friday (must get to Yard Dog, must buy clothes at Capra & Cavelli, must prepare panels). My bleedin’ head is spinning.

I pick Dave up at the airport at 1:30 on Friday. All is madness before then, the frenetic warmup to five days of utter pandemonium.

I love this time of year.